Squish is Eleven Months Old!

Happy 11 months, Squishy!

Can you believe this sweet squishy nugget will be ONE YEAR OLD next month? I for one refuse to believe it. We've had such a wonderful 11 months! He truly is the most chill and relaxed babe... unless he's hungry. Or tired. Or told no. Basically, if he's happy, we're all happy!

He is officially 100% mobile and I'm not sure how I feel about it. With LO, we were all about assisting her to get moving when she was a wee one. In fact, she was walking at 10 months old. What?! Why?! I don't even know. With this last go 'round, we've enjoyed the peace that comes from knowing the little guy was right where we left him. Of course that would only last so long.

He's crawling like a boss and has started pulling up in his crib, the pack n' play, and the living room ottoman. He still LOVES holding fingers to stand up and walk, and his balance has improved a bunch in just the past week or two. He also loves to clap his hands and he thinks it's hilarious when I sign "all done" to him. He still takes a paci -- the same kind he's had since birth -- and I'm totally okay with it. I did lower his crib now that he's pulling up, and also removed the breathable mesh bumper that was in there. That means that his paci inevitably rolls between the slats and onto the floor occasionally, but it doesn't seem to bother him. We also keep a spare in there so he has a backup when needed.

He still only has his two bottom teeth, but his top right one has been threatening to come in for weeks! You can clearly see it under his gums but it hasn't officially popped through yet. It looks so uncomfortable, but he's a champ!

He loves to eat! We still keep a stash of baby foods that he enjoys, but for the most part he eats whatever we're eating. Especially bread. The boy LOVES his carbs! I haven't weighed him lately but I'm pretty sure he's around the 22 pound mark. And so unbelievably squishy!!!

#sorrynotsorry in advance for the plethora of pics I'm about to share here! This guy was just so much fun when I took his 11 month pics... I had to post them!

So smiley.

Those big toes! LOL!

He's starting to lose interest in this photoshoot thing...

But mommy tried cheering him on a bit, which made him want to clap, too!

Yay???

Those lashes. Can you even? #notfair

Oh. Please disregard the scabs from carpet burn on his nose. Bless!

I think he's considering a quick getaway through the window here...

Again with those lashes!

And the toes... I can't even!

Uh, oh. I think it *might* be time to put the camera down. LOL!

This is seriously a look where I clearly see pleading and begging in his eyes. Poor babe!

Life is good again! He's on the floor and finally has the freedom to MOVE! Bye, mommy! ;)

Love this sweet piece of goodness SO SO SO SO much!!!

The Big Birthday Bash!

Chase's 1st birthday party was so much fun! We partied and ate and celebrated and ate and opened gifts and ate some more! Can't go wrong with that, eh?

So I'm just posting a TON o' pictures on this post and providing a little commentary. The day was wonderful and emotional and I can't help but feel so very privileged to have been blessed with an entire year with my sweet boy. God is so good!

One of the party favors... blue M&Ms and banana Runts!

Some table decor... candy!

My favorite party favor in the gift bags I gave to our party goers... personalized

 Purell bottles!

Chocolate-dipped pretzel sticks... yum!

Ready for the party favor bags!

Of course there was plenty of food!

I rolled up the forks in the napkins and printed a little monkey napkin ring for each one.

More food...

Little appetizers.

The "O-N-E" I used for Chase's party invitation made a nice addition to the table decor!

A LOT of food!

Chase's smash cake!

Uhhh... more food!

Chase's smash cake! It was a layer of vanilla cake, cookies & cream buttercream filling, and a layer of chocolate cake, all covered in buttercream! Hey, you only turn ONE once, right?!

The cake! Yay! It turned out pretty much like I imagined it would. I didn't put a LOT of time into details, but pretty much put it together exactly as I had sketched it out. The bottom cake is dark chocolate with cookies & cream buttercream filling, and the top cake is just vanilla with buttercream. I think the chocolate one was AWESOME, but the vanilla definitely needed some adjustments. I had such a hard time finding a good vanilla cake recipe! Argh!

A shot of the dark chocolate cake... Delish!

The vanilla cake... a bit too dry for my taste, but still pretty! ;)

Time to sing to the birthday boy! He was a bit timid with all of the singing and gathering around him, but there were no tears!

It didn't take him long to get into the fun of eating cake. And of course you'll notice LO got her fingers in there, too!

Cake is yummy!

"All done!"

After the cake, Chase and I opened his gifts and boy did he make out awesome with all his new stuff! It's been quite a challenge to get LO to understand that these are Chase's new toys, not hers. I think she thought it was Christmas morning!

After the guests left, we put Chase and LO down for naps. Chase hardly slept for 30 minutes before he was up again, ready to party! I think he realized his only opportunity to play with all of his new toys was while LO was taking her nap... ;)

Later into the evening, we were getting ready to eat dinner so hubs grabbed Chase from the play area and brought him into the kitchen to eat. I happened to notice Chase's drool was quite pink -- very unusual and not at all expected! Upon further research, we found this:

You may or may not be able to see it in the picture, but somehow the boy got a TINY little cut on his gums, well below the gum line where a new tooth was popping up. The only thing we can figure is that he somehow jabbed his gums with his fingernail, but it was so crazy because he never once cried or made any noise whatsoever that he had been hurt. It didn't seem to bother him at all, but I'll tell you the blood was POURING out of this teeny little cut and pooling between his gums and bottom lip. Of course he was swallowing all of this and I was desperate to figure out what to do. I tried using a paper towel to put pressure on it, but he got MAD! Then a washcloth with an ice cube in it... he didn't want anything to do with that, either. I decided to call our pediatrician's office to speak with the nurse on call, who suggested I mix up a slushy with lots of ice and some juice. He surprised me and ate it from a spoon for 10 minutes or so, but I still saw no decrease in the bleeding. I fed him some soft banana and a jar of baby food, got him dressed for bed and took another look. It finally started to look like the bleeding was slowing down. We went ahead and put him to bed, and checked on him about an hour or so later. He was sleeping peacefully with his paci in, and when we took it out, there was no sign of blood anywhere on his paci or in his mouth. WHEW! We were seriously worried we might have to take him to the ER on a Saturday night, which was ridiculous considering how TINY the cut was and that we knew they wouldn't really be able to do anything for him anyway. Luckily he woke up wonderfully (albeit quite late... not 'til after 10AM!) this morning and has been super-great all day, with no sign at all of his little boo-boo. What an awesome trooper!

We had a wonderful day celebrating all that Chase (and hubs and LO and I) have made it through over the past year, and look forward to celebrating many more birthdays and milestones in the years ahead! God has blessed us beyond measure with our son, and we couldn't be more grateful for His goodness and grace.

Thank you to all of our blog readers, heart families and friends who have followed our journey and prayed for us along the way. I know we would never be where we are today if it wasn't for the love and support of our friends and family, so THANK YOU!!!!!

Reflections...

I've got a lot to do. My list is two pages long, and it's not all crossed off just yet. Chase's 1st birthday party will officially begin in less than 3 hours. Yet I find myself drawn to writing this post. A post of reflections. This isn't a reflection of all that Chase has been through over the past year. It's not a reflection of where we were one year ago today. It's a reflection of God's grace. His love. His blessings unfolding abundantly on undeserving little me.

When we started our heart journey with Chase on June 16, 2009, my life changed. Forever. I will never be the same person. At the time, that was a scary thought. But now? I am so grateful that God has changed me. He's pushed me to grow as a Christian, a wife, a mother and a person. He's pushed me through the deepest darkness I've ever known. He's pushed me closer to Him. And for that, I couldn't be more thankful.

Life as a heart mom isn't easy. There isn't a DAY MOMENT that goes by that I don't think of the "what if's" of having a child with a special heart. Point blank: The fear of losing my child is REAL and is with me EVERY MOMENT of EVERY DAY. Most parents don't have to deal with this. But I do. And it's so very hard. But God continues to push me. He pushes me through those dark thoughts and fears and reminds me of just how good He is. And He is so very good.

I can't help but think, as we celebrate Chase's first year, that there are so many other families who have lost their precious little one to this evil thing called HLHS. So many  young, innocent little lives have been called home to Heaven while their parents grieve and mourn their loss. This is unimaginable to me. I fear it happening to me every day, but to actually experience it? There are no words. There have been so many lost, and there are so many who are fighting for their life even as I type this post. I cannot understand this side of Heaven why God chooses to let some of these precious little ones stay here with their families, while some of them are called home to be with Him. So as I celebrate all that God has done for my sweet Chase over the past year, I can't help but think of all of the families who will never experience the joy of the amazing milestone of their child's first birthday. We are so blessed. And I do not for one second take that for granted.

As I looked back on the blog to see what we were up to one year ago today (3 days before Chase's birth -- there was a Target run, a dead Jeep battery and a lack of AT&T cell phone service involved -- I came across a post I wrote that contained some quotes from a book titled, Little Miracles, compiled by Dan Zadra. There are a few quotes that are especially meaningful to me today, and I'd like to share them with you again.

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. ~ Joseph Campbell

All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

I've never been one who thought the Lord should make life easy; I've just asked Him to make me strong. ~ Eva Bowring

When nothing is sure, everything is possible. ~ Margaret Drabble

Where there is great love, there are always miracles. ~ Willa Cather

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today. ~ William Allen White

How simple it is to see all the worry in the world cannot control the future. How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now, and that there will never be a time when it is not now. ~ Gerald Jampolsky

A Sneak Peek...

I'm so excited!!! Can't wait to celebrate my boy tomorrow!!!




Posted from my iPhone

Who...

...will be celebrating his FIRST BIRTHDAY with a great big party tomorrow?

THIS GUY!!!



I'm so excited about his party and all of the little details I've put into it! Oh, and the cake is coming together like you wouldn't believe! I can't wait to share it with you after his party! There WILL be lots of pics, people! I'm just sayin'!

So stay tuned!!!

Posted from my iPhone